How to Write an Effective Paragraph

Before we have our conversation about paper outlines and thesis statements, I wanted to address writing at the paragraph level by discussing how to write an effective paragraph.  The best paragraph will always have a topic sentence, or a sentence that expresses the main point of the entire paragraph.  A topic sentence can occur at the beginning, end, the middle, or for that matter anywhere else in the paragraph.  However, it is considered more effective to place the topic sentence at or toward the beginning of the paragraph. 

Purdue OWL notes that one paragraph should contain one idea.  When you want to introduce a new idea, you should begin a new paragraph.  You should also be sure to effectively transition between ideas from paragraph to paragraph, and between sentences within a paragraph.  In order to make this transition between sentences more effective, Purdue OWL states, you should employ these strategies for the sake of coherence:

Logical bridges

The same idea of a topic is carried over from sentence to sentence
Successive sentences can be constructed in parallel form

Verbal bridges

Key words can be repeated in several sentences
Synonymous words can be repeated in several sentences
Pronouns can refer to nouns in previous sentences
Transition words can be used to link ideas from different sentences

You should also make sure that your paragraph is well-developed, which means employing these rules:

Use examples and illustrations
Cite data (facts, statistics, evidence, details, and others)
Examine testimony (what other people say such as quotes and paraphrases)
Use an anecdote or story
Define terms in the paragraph
Compare and contrast
Evaluate causes and reasons
Examine effects and consequences
Analyze the topic
Describe the topic
Offer a chronology of an event (time segments)

I find that using quotations, in particularly, can help to really put across the main topic of a paragraph.  All of these strategies, however, are helpful and can be used to craft expert paragraphs.  Good luck with writing your papers, and I will see you next week!

Trailer for Martin Scorsese's Silence

This week saw the debut of the trailer for Martin Scorsese's long delayed passion project, Silence.  The link to the trailer is here:

http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2016/11/23/watch_the_trailer_for_silence_martin_scorsese_s_passion_project_video.html

Slate.com's article on the movie and the trailer is here:

http://www.slate.com/blogs/browbeat/2016/11/23/watch_the_trailer_for_silence_martin_scorsese_s_passion_project_video.html

I'm a longtime admirer of the films of Martin Scorsese, and I've been waiting to see this film for a long time.  If you aren't familiar with Martin Scorsese's films, every film of his is worth seeing and is a masterpiece of sorts.  My favorites are Taxi Driver, Raging Bull, GoodFellas, The Aviator, and Shutter Island, but they are all great and will teach you a great deal about human nature.  Stunningly well (read: fast) paced, well photographed, well acted, and well written.  Check them out!

Definitely looking forward to this one!

Clarity in writing

One rule that I often feel needs to be emphasized with regard to writing is the importance of clarity in writing.  Good writing is clear writing, and vice versa.  There is always the temptation when one is writing an essay, for example, to add complex words or to write overly lengthy sentences in an attempt to appear intellectual.  I would avoid doing such things, as you then run the risk of losing your reader.  Sentences should be relatively brief while also effectively communicating its point.  The words used, on the whole, should be words that the average reader can understand.  If you absolutely have to use a word that the average reader might not understand, try to at least define it in the body of what you are writing.  Finally, make proper use of commas and periods in order to properly separate important ideas for each other.

Have a nice Thanksgiving, and I will see you next week!

Gentle Editing Services

In keeping with the writing strategies focus of this blog, I have as recently as last month started my own company called Gentle Editing Services.  The main focus of the company is to fine tune projects that employ language, whether it's a master's thesis, a dissertation, a final paper, a blog, or something similar.  I am available on the website Thumbtack in that capacity, and I recently created a bunch of brochures and business cards for that purpose as well.  However, if you feel you are in need of my services, you may also contact me through this blog.  My phone number is (620) 636-0717 and my main email is genec121@yahoo.com.  The standard quote is $30 an hour, per project.  Please put me to work for you!  Hope to hear from you soon!

Elizabeth Shaw: Security Officer: Episode One

This is a teleplay that I wrote (for a TV series that I invented) inspired by the character Elizabeth Shaw, the main character from Ridley Scott's Prometheus.  I admire that film for its thematic depth, its visual beauty, and its rewatchability.  Since it can't be produced at present time, I intend to keep the series going as a series of blog installments here.  Here is the first episode.  Enjoy!

Elizabeth Shaw: Security Officer

Pilot Episode

By

Ted Gentle

Scene: the red, gelatinous interior of a cloning room.  Everything is circular, and there is a small black hole in the center of the ceiling.  Along the walls of the interior there are windows, and the black silhouettes of watching people lurk behind them.

Suddenly, a yellow ooze begins to drip from the black hole in the ceiling.  It gathers in a glob and then begins to spread out across the floor.  Slowly, a dark shape begins to emerge from beneath the yellow ooze.  The dark shape is a human figure lying on the floor, the clone of ELIZABETH SHAW.

Just as suddenly, a second hole opens in the side of the interior of the room, and the yellow ooze slowly drains away.  As the last of the ooze drains down the hole, Shaw is sucked through the hole with it.

CUT to a second room that is similar to the first room, on the other side of the windows.  A series of figures dressed in gray stand in a line at the front of the room.  MEREDITH VICKERS, also dressed in a gray uniform, is standing in the center of the line of people.  The river of yellow ooze pouring from the hole in front of them lands with a splash in front of them.

CLOSE UP of the ooze splashing against and past the black shoes of the people dressed in gray.  Then CUT to a close up of Vickers wincing as the ooze hits her feet.

CUT to a shot of Shaw slumping in front of them, covered in the yellow ooze, naked.

Suddenly, small pores open up in the ceiling and floor of this room.  Water shoots through the pores in the ceiling, cleaning the yellow ooze off Shaw, and then the water and ooze drain away through the pores in the floor.  Blasts of air then shoot through the pores, blowing Shaw dry.  After a while, the air stops.

Quickly, two figures standing beside Vickers rush to provide Shaw with a white t-shirt and white pants.  She puts them on.  There is a CLOSE-UP of her face as she sighs.  She has been through an ordeal.  She then slowly looks up and takes in what is around and in front of her.

SHAW

            Where am I?  Who are all of you?  How am I still alive?

There is a CLOSE UP of Vickers, blurry, from Shaw’s perspective.  Slowly, Vickers comes into focus.

                                                                        SHAW

            Vickers!  What are you doing here?  You can’t still be alive!

                                                                        VICKERS

            I’m not Vickers, Shaw.  Well, I am, but I’m not.  I’m Vickers 10.  The Vickers you knew was Vickers 9.  I’m a model of android, just like David was.  It’s a long story.  We need to talk. 

                                                            (Pause)

            Come on.  Follow me.

The men in gray uniforms move to the left and right hand side as a second hole, this one about the height of Shaw and Vickers, opens in the outer red wall of this room.  Blackness awaits them outside.  Vickers walks out into it and Shaw follows.

CUT to a white, glistening, seemingly impossibly big futuristic hallway/moving sidewalk/roadway.  Men and women in various futuristic looking clothes walk side by side on the far left, other men and women dressed in similar clothes move on the moving sidewalk in the middle, and on the far right various futuristic flying motorcycles and cars fly by.  On the far left, Shaw and Vickers emerge from a dark corridor and enter the crowd of walking people in futuristic clothes.

CUT to a shot behind and close to Shaw and Vickers as they walk through the busy crowd.  Vehicles buzz and whirr to the left of them.  Our perspective is tilted upward, and we can see hovering, electronic signs above the crowd displaying numbers and directions for navigation.

VICKERS

            Welcome to Earth.  For reasons that are classified, we had to clone you and bring you here.  You have very good survival instincts, Shaw.  You fared very well on the Prometheus expedition, or at least as well as could reasonably be expected.  Now we have some matters for you to attend to here on Earth.  You hungry?

SHAW

            Do clones eat?

CUT back to the same angle of the hallway/moving sidewalk/roadway.  Shaw and Vickers now move closer to the front of our view, and they cross a bridge past the crowd, the sidewalk, and the traffic and toward some glass doors that had until now not been noticeable to us.  Vickers opens one and enters, and Shaw follows her.

CUT to a sideways shot of Shaw and Vickers sitting down at a table, both with a plate of food.  They begin to eat.  Shaw drinks from a cup.  After a moment, we cut to Vickers.

VICKERS

            You know, during the expedition, I. . .  I mean, it wasn’t really me, but. . .  I did some pretty mean things.  Before we get started, I wanted to say that I’m sorry.

CUT to a black and white flashback of Shaw screaming while Vickers torches her husband, Charlie Holloway, during the first Prometheus expedition.

CUT to Shaw looking at Vickers with sadness, confusion, anger.

VICKERS

(Somewhat aloofly)

            Anyway, we need to focus on why we’re here. 

(Then more seriously)

Neither of us is who we appear to be, but there’s a reason why we’re here.  The company put us here for a reason.  You know, when you stop and think about it, a pretty incredible series of events led us to go on that expedition.  Do you remember what exactly led you to those sites with those engravings?

SHAW

            Why. . .  why should I help you?

CUT to a shot of Shaw and Vickers looking at each other.  A robot flies by.

VICKERS

            How about for this?

Vickers extends her hand, revealing a metal cross inside of it.

CUT to a reaction shot of Shaw.  She exhales.

VICKERS

            It’s just a replica, but I know how much this means to you, Shaw.  I can offer you more than that, too.  I can give you your old life back.  A better life, Shaw.

CUT to a half-body shot of SHAW at the table, staring at VICKERS’ outstretched hand.  Slowly, she reaches forward and takes the cross from her.

CUT to a shot of her looking downward, crying.  She then wipes the tears from her eyes and looks up, sighing.

CUT to a shot of SHAW putting the cross in her pocket.  Then CUT to a shot of SHAW slowly looking up to speak.

SHAW

            I’ve. . .  I’ve always seen things.  Had these visions.  Back then, when I was with Charlie, I would wake up late at night and have these visions. 

CUT to a shot of Shaw in bed with Charlie Holloway, then suddenly waking up and slowly rising out of bed, looking to the left of the screen.

Something, someone, pulling me out, away.  Then one night, in a blast of light, I saw them.  Every single one of them, each engraving. 

CUT to each engraving being displayed in a flash of light, from each of the various locations from Prometheus.

CUT back to SHAW speaking to VICKERS.

SHAW

Each location.  Then, I. . .  I knew.  We had to go.  I. . .  I still hear it sometimes.  That voice.  I’m not sure what it is exactly, but it’s there.

CUT to a shot of the head of a Xenomorph-type monster, all black, with a blinding flash of light behind it.

CUT back to the shot of SHAW speaking to VICKERS.  SHAW stops speaking and shudders.

CUT to a reaction shot of VICKERS.  She nods.

VICKERS

            We need your help, Shaw.  The world isn’t doing so well.  Forget about space, you need to take a look at the world around us.  There’s a lot of conflict, especially between robots and people.  Robots are perceived as taking the jobs of people, and there’ve been outbreaks of violence between people and robots for that reason.  When Weyland died, I became the head of the company, but that’s a problem, Shaw.

A single tear runs down Vicker’s face as she says this.  She wipes it away.

VICKERS

            There’s more.  That black goo that we discovered on LV-223.  It’s on earth now.  People are using it, almost like a drug.  Other crews have encountered it in space.  They’re calling it the Accelerant now.  It’s causing all sorts of bizarre activity.  Mutations.

(Pause, then with emphasis)

            Shaw, is there anything you can tell me about any of this?

CUT to a close-up, sideways shot of SHAW looking at VICKERS.  There is a clash of symbols off-screen, and then SHAW is covered in white flakes.  The scene dissolves into a shot of a completely white, glowing room.  The enormous head of the Xenomorph-type monster is lying in the center of the room, and SHAW is standing to the rear and right of the room, in her explorer outfit from Prometheus.  She is wearing her cross around her neck.

XENOMORPH MONSTER

            It’s all been me.  You know it’s all been me.

SHAW

            What have you done?  Why do you hate us?  Why are you trying to kill us?

XENOMORPH MONSTER

            It’s the way it is, Shaw.  It’s the way it’s always been.  I might ask the same questions of you.  Why do you do what you do, Shaw?  Why do you persist with your quest?  Why do you keep going, after everything that’s happened to you?

SHAW

            I persist because I believe.  And because I have to know the truth.

CUT to a close-up of SHAW’s cross around her neck, glistening.

XENOMORPH MONSTER

            Look at me, Shaw.  I am as old and as ancient as time itself.  I have created all of this.  Things you know of, and things that have yet to be revealed to you.  I live to kill and destroy.  That is what I am.  That is why I exist.  There is no meaning to it.  No point whatsoever.  Your creator?  He simply does not exist.  Your attempts to know me, to understand me, to define me, are futile.  I am all there is.  This destruction.  This death.

CUT to a set of black tentacles coming up from the floor, ensnaring SHAW.  She struggles and writhes around, gasping.  One tentacle makes glancing contact with her skin, and it burns away.

CUT to a close-up of the XENOMORPH MONSTER’s face, as it yells out in pain.

XENOMORPH MONSTER

            Aaaaarrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhh!

CUT to a close-up of SHAW, crying out in fear and pain.

SHAW

            Aaaaaahhhhh!

CUT to a shot of SHAW back in the cafeteria, startled back into consciousness.

SHAW

            Oohh!

CUT to a shot of VICKERS, surprised by and taking in what she has just witnessed SHAW go through.

SHAW

            I’ll. . .  I’ll never be able to escape it.  To escape him.  I have an ability.  I believe that I can use it. . .  yes, use it. . .  to help you.

VICKERS

            Come on.

CUT to a shot of VICKERS, then SHAW, rising from their table.  Behind them, a robot wizzes behind them carrying a tray of food.  In the background, a second robot shoots cheerios from a tube in its body into the bowl of a man sitting down.  VICKERS and SHAW both walk toward a set of glass doors in the background.  They go through them and exit.

CUT to a shot of a presentation room, similar to the one seen in the opening of Prometheus.  There are chairs facing the front of the room, and people inhabiting some of these chairs.  Among these people are a robot named Chip, who is made of metal and has long, cylindrical arms and legs, a big and stocky man named Dregg Wilson, who is bald and has a scruffy red beard, a good-looking and well-developed man, named Matt Olson, who has combed brown hair, and a technical officer named James Bradley, who is short, skinny, and wears glasses.  We CUT to a quick shot of them, waiting on the presentation from VICKERS.  Other men are sitting behind them, also waiting on the presentation.  These men are all in uniform, except for Chip, and are called Security Officers.

CUT to a shot of SHAW and VICKERS walking to the front of the room and standing in the center of the screen.  As lights begin to flicker behind them, the wall behind them is revealed to be a holographic screen.

VICKERS

            Attention.  I have someone special to introduce you all to today.  Her name is Elizabeth Shaw, and she will be assisting us on some of our missions.  As of right now, Shaw is one of you.  A Security Officer.

CUT to the screen behind them, which flickers into focus.  There are images of people in gangs with protest signs attacking robots.  There is then an image of a man consuming a cylinder of Accelerant and turning into a bizarre, purple mutant.  He then attacks people surrounding him.  These images continue behind SHAW and VICKERS.

VICKERS

            As you know, our company is now faced with many unique challenges.  So as you go out to face them, remember to collaborate with Shaw.  She has something unique to offer all of you; a connection to the force, whatever it is, that is creating and sowing all of this conflict and evil.

CUT to a close-up of VICKERS.

VICKERS

            Olson, Bradley, you’ll be going out with Shaw.  Olson will be your operating partner, Shaw, and Bradley will provide technical support for you and Olson.  Be careful out there.  Shaw, go to the locker room to my left to get your locker and uniform.  Your vehicle will be waiting for you in front of the Weyland-Yutani building.  Dismissed.

CUT to a shot of the Weyland-Yutani building, in the middle of the night.  It is a massive building that seems to stretch up to reach the sky.  A large, green, tank-like vehicle waits in front of the building.  SHAW bounds out of the front exit of the building, wearing a green, military-style uniform and helmet.  She is also wearing her cross. 

CUT to a shot, from SHAW’s perspective, of the green, tank-like vehicle.  The door on the side of the vehicle hisses and then slowly moves upward to open.  OLSON is in the front driver’s seat, dressed in the same style of uniform and helmet.  He is leaning forward, smiling.

OLSON

            Ready when you are.

CUT to a shot of SHAW from OLSON’s perspective.  She slowly begins to smile, then slides into her seat in the vehicle.

CUT to a shot of SHAW sitting in her seat.  The door slowly closes at her right-hand side.

CUT to a shot of OLSON, who starts the vehicle and begins to drive.  He begins to speak to SHAW, glancing at her occasionally while he does so.  The camera will cut back and forth between them as they speak.

OLSON

            Hi, I’m Olson.  You’re Shaw, right?

SHAW nods.

OLSON

            Bradley’s in the back.  He’ll be our technical officer for this evening. 

(Through a mouthpiece in his helmet)

            How we looking, Bradley?

CUT to a shot of BRADLEY sitting in a chair and surrounded by all sorts of monitors and computerized panels in the back.

BRADLEY

            It’s dark, and now it’s starting to rain a little.

CUT to a shot of the monitors from BRADLEY’s perspective, which shows this.  Then CUT back to BRADLEY.

BRADLEY

            Sure will let you know if any of that changes.

CUT back to OLSON, who responds through his mouthpiece.

OLSON

            Thanks, pal.  Sounds good.  Let me know if it gets rough out there.

SHAW

            So how long have you been doing this for?

OLSON

            A few years.  They have all kinds of security officers, you know.  I guess they wanted someone with a little experience to handle a special case like this. 

Thunder crashes in the background.  There is a shot through the windshield where the rain has started to pick up.  The windshield wipers are going.

OLSON

            The things we’re looking at these days, they’re pretty rough.  A case like this, it means a lot to me, you know.  Having someone like you here to help, it really means a lot.  You know, someone with your instincts.  Abilities.

CUT to a reaction shot from SHAW, who is taking this all in.

OLSON

            Are you getting anything?  I mean, can you sense anything?

SHAW

(Pause)

            No.  No, not yet.

OLSON

(Pause)

            Do you think it’s different now?

SHAW

            I don’t know.  No.  No, it can’t be.  Everything is different now, that’s true.  But it can’t. . .  it just can’t be that different.

CUT back to the shot through the windshield.  The tank rounds a corner.

SHAW

            I just have to look at this as an opportunity.  If I can do something good, that would make everything worth it.  And if they could use what they did to me to bring back Charlie, well, then, everything would be okay.

OLSON

            Right.

(Scratches head)

            Right, right.  Well, listen, I have great faith that this will lead to good things.  A lot has changed in the company since Vickers took over.  I mean, we all have to play ball, that’s part of the job.  But stick around.  Good things are bound to happen.

There is the sound of electrical static.  OLSON touches his mouthpiece.  BRADLEY is speaking through his headgear.

BRADLEY

            Things are starting to come down a little harder, boss.  And there’s a storm front headed our way.

OLSON

            Oh, great.  Thanks.

CUT to a shot of SHAW, who suddenly has started to rub the left side of her temple.

OLSON

            What is it?  Anything?

SHAW

            Yes.  I can feel it.  It’s near.  Keep driving, and let me guide you.

CUT back to the shot through the windshield.  We see what they see through the windshield as we also hear commands from SHAW.

SHAW

            Turn left.  Now take this next right.  Keep going.

Suddenly, on the left side of the screen, we see a homeless man approaching and then walking into a factory building.

SHAW

            There!

QUICK CUT to the tank coming to a screeching halt.

CUT back to the front interior of the tank, where SHAW and OLSON are both firmly pressed against their seats.

CUT to a close-up of OLSON, who with gritted teeth clutches his mouthpiece.

OLSON

            Bradley, what can you tell me about this homeless guy?

CUT to a close-up of one of BRADLEY’s computer screens, which takes a photo of the homeless man, enlarges a sideways view of the face, and then pulls up another photo from a file that is identical.  A ping noise goes off as the computer recognizes the match.  The label of the photo reads “Alan White.”  We then hear BRADLEY’s voice as the camera cuts, mid-dialogue, to a shot of BRADLEY’s face, aglow in computer light.

BRADLEY

            That’s Alan White.  Wanted on two counts of international drug smuggling.  One count arms smuggling.  He could be moving Accelerant.

CUT back to OLSON, speaking through his mouthpiece.

OLSON

            Tell me about the building.  How big?  How many people inside?

CUT back to BRADLEY’s workstation.  An overhead schematic of the factory building shows several corridors within the building that contain several cylinders, possibly containing Accelerant.  BRADLEY flips a switch and suddenly we see an infrared image on top of the schematic, showing us dozens of people moving up and down the corridors and around the cylinders, and a single person at the back of the building, perhaps the leader.

CUT to a close-up of BRADLEY.

BRADLEY

            Big enough to house a lot of Accelerant, boss.  We’re talking at least two dozen people in that building, plus their leader.  Calling for back up now.

CUT to a second monitor.  A number pad appears and a number is dialed, and a video feed for VICKERS appears on the left side of the monitor.

VICKERS

            Hold tight.  They’re already on their way.

CUT back to a shot of OLSON, who nods, removes his hand from his mouthpiece, and looks at SHAW.

OLSON

            Great.  Thank you, both of you.

(Addressing SHAW)

            Now we wait.

CUT to a shot of SHAW, who puts her hands to her face and sighs.

CUT to an outside image of the green tank and the alleyway behind it.  A large number of police cars race down it and then come to a screeching halt right behind the green tank, sirens blazing.  Security officers start pouring out of the police cars, guns drawn.

OLSON

            That was quick!  They’re here!

(Draws gun, as the doors to the tank hiss open)

            Let’s go!

CUT to SHAW, who draws her gun and gets out of the tank, her door now fully open.

CUT to SHAW and OLSON running, with the other security officers, toward the factory building.  BRADLEY is audible on the radio.

BRADLEY

            Good luck, boss.

OLSON runs up to the factory building with the others and kicks down the door.  SHAW and the other security officers run to follow him inside.

CUT to the interior of the factory building, where a number of cylinders containing The Accelerant line the corridors of the building.  Men dressed as bums work control panels at each cylinder in order to keep The Accelerant in check.  As the noise from the security officers enters the room, the men turn to the left-hand side of the screen.  We can hear the security officers say “get your hands in the air” over and over.

CUT to OLSON running into the building past the broken door, the head of the pack.  He comes to a standstill in the front of the room and raises his gun in the air.

OLSON

            Get your hands in the air now!  I said now!

CUT to a shot of the man in the back of the room.  He is bald on the top of his head, has long white hair, and has a scar going down the left side of his cheek.  He is wearing black except for a long beige coat that he wears.  He raises his head as he hears OLSON.

CUT to a swarm of security officers moving down the corridors of the building, handcuffing the men dressed as bums, who have their hands raised.  OLSON and SHAW run past them, toward the back of the building.

CUT to the back of the building.  The man with the scar confidently walks forward and scales a ladder that moves up one of the cylinders.

CUT to the top of that cylinder.  The man with the scar emerges from the top of the ladder, then walks down a walkway toward the opening of the cylinder.

CUT to OLSON and SHAW finally emerging from one of the corridors.  They hear the sound of the man on the walkway, both simultaneously look up, and see the man with the scar as he prepares to enter the cylinder.  They both raise their guns high.  OLSON cries out to the man with the scar.

OLSON

            Don’t even think about it!

OLSON and SHAW both fire their guns numerous times.

CUT to the man with the scar running down the corridor, successfully dodging their gunfire.  He runs and leaps into the open cylinder, causing a splash of black Accelerant to move up into the air.

CUT to a shot of the entire cylinder, which starts to rumble.

CUT to a close-up of OLSON and SHAW, looking upwards, watching.

OLSON

            Oh no.

SHAW

(Looking around her, panicked)

            No!

CUT to a shot of the entire cylinder, which starts to rumble.  Suddenly, the cylinder cracks open, spraying Accelerant everywhere.  From the center of the ooze, an enormous Xenomorph also jumps out.  What once was the man with the scar has now turned into a monster.

CUT to a shot of OLSON with his gun raised.  He fires at the beast twice but misses both times, and then the Xenomorph lands on him.

CUT to a shot of the Xenomorph, now on solid ground, with OLSON in its mouth.  The creature wrings OLSON back and forth in its teeth, making a bloody mess of him.  Then it hisses before tossing him into a wall on its left. 

SHAW

            No!  Matt!

CUT to a shot of SHAW running fast toward the creature, firing her gun again and again. 

CUT to a shot of the Xenomorph, which runs toward SHAW, hissing.  The bullets hit the center of the creature, severely weakening it.  It growls in pain, then reaches out with a claw toward SHAW.

CUT to a shot of SHAW being slashed in the left arm by the claw of the creature.

SHAW

            Aaaahhh!

CUT to a shot of the Xenomorph suddenly being ripped apart by a blast of gunfire.  Its acidic blood sprays to the back of the building. 

CUT to a shot of BRADLEY, large rifle in hand, smoke coming out of the muzzle.  He lowers the rifle and moves toward SHAW, who is kneeling on the ground with her injured arm.

BRADLEY

            I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner. It took the monitors a while to register it. Are you okay?

CUT to the busted down door at the front of the building.  VICKERS rushes through the entrance.

CUT to VICKERS arriving at the back of the building, where BRADLEY and SHAW are now standing over OLSON’s body.

BRADLEY

            I just radio’d for a med team.

VICKERS

            So did I.

CUT to a shot of a hospital room inside the Weyland-Yutani building.  OLSON is stretched out on a table, covered in bandages and connected to a futuristic life support machine that beeps and shows a reading for his heart beat.  Several medical personnel are treating his wounds and adjusting the machinery.  In front of them all, VICKERS, BRADLEY, and SHAW stand watch.  SHAW’s left arm has been bandaged.

VICKERS

            Believe it or not, he’ll be okay soon.  We’ve got good technology here.  Shaw, how’s your arm?

CUT to a shot of the three of them, VICKERS, BRADLEY, and SHAW.  SHAW touches her left arm after VICKERS says this.

SHAW

            It hurts a lot, but it will be okay.  What was that thing?  I’ve never. . .  seen one like that before.

VICKERS

            I don’t know.  It’s something we haven’t seen yet.  The Accelerant is capable of a lot of different things.  Back at the factory building, well. . .  we still have it’s body.  We need to run some tests.

Suddenly, static comes from BRADLEY’s headset.  He touches his ear to listen.  DREGG WILSON is about to speak.

BRADLEY

            Yeah?

WILSON

            This is Dregg Wilson.  We’ve got a science team here at the factory building on Palmer, and we’re kind of mopping things up here, but. . .  you three might want to come and check this out for yourselves.

SHAW

            Yes.  I can help with that.

VICKERS

            Good.  You two go.  I want to stay here and keep an eye on things.

BRADLEY looks at SHAW, smiles, and turns to leave.

BRADLEY

            Let’s go.

CUT to a shot behind SHAW and BRADLEY walking down one of the corridors in the factory building toward the building’s back.  WILSON is facing them, walking backwards as they walk forwards, and speaking.  A plastic tent is visible to the left of WILSON’s shoulder.  SHAW, BRADLEY, and WILSON are all wearing containment suits.

WILSON

            Not sure yet where they got this stuff, but they were moving a ton of it.  Most were dressed as homeless guys, so they could sell it on the street.  We’re emptying the containers so that we can analyze the Accelerant now.  That is if it doesn’t mutate us or fry our hardware first.  We’re not sure who funded this, but they’ve got top of the line hardware, that’s for sure.  But here comes the really weird part.

WILSON walks up to the tent and unzips its door.  A man in a containment suit steps out and walks past them.

WILSON

            C’mon in.

WILSON enters, and SHAW and BRADLEY follow.

CUT to a shot inside of the plastic tent.  After SHAW and BRADLEY step inside the tent, WILSON zips the door back up.  The three of them then look to the right of the screen.

CUT to a close-up of SHAW’s face.

SHAW

            Oh, my God.

CUT to a shot of the Xenomorph, badly injured (nearly cut in half) by BRADLEY’s shotgun blast.  Half of the Xenomorph has reverted back to the man with the scar, and a man in a containment suit to the left of the Xenomorph is currently cutting the man with the scar out of the Xenomorph’s body with a lazer.

SHAW

            How long has he been like this?  Tests. . .  all sorts of tests need to be run on him.

WILSON

            Right.  We’ll get to that.  First we need to talk to him.

CUT to a shot of the man finally being cut out of the Xenomorph.  He slumps to the floor, covered in black ooze.

CUT to a close-up of WILSON’s face.

WILSON

            Take him in!

CUT to a dark, almost black, interrogation room.  The man with a scar sits at a table with an ashtray, smoking a cigarette.  WILSON sits at the right side of the table, facing the man.  Plate glass separates WILSON and the man with the scar from SHAW, BRADLEY, and VICKERS, who watch the interrogation through the glass.  WILSON, SHAW, and BRADLEY are now out of their containment suits and in uniform.

WILSON

            So we’ve got your name.  Thomas Stephens.  But we need to know more, man.  How did you get this stuff?  Who do you work for?  Why are you selling it?

STEPHENS

            Look, man, all I can tell you is it’s big.  It spans galaxies.  We’ve seen, done some amazing things.  And the money?  Whew.  Unbelievable.

WILSON slams the table with his outstretched palm.  STEPHENS drops his cigarette.

WILSON

            Look, don’t play with me!  This isn’t a damn game!  You tell me the truth!  Who do you work for?  Who?

STEPHENS laughs, sneers.  WILSON then grabs him by the neck with both hands.

STEPHENS

            All right, all right!  Let go!

STEPHENS grabs at WILSON’s hands, and WILSON quickly lets go.

STEPHENS

            We work for Tyrell Corp.  Okay?

VICKERS voice suddenly cuts through.

VICKERS

            Why?  What’s the point?

STEPHENS

            Oh come on, man.  Take a look around.  It’s corporate warfare.  Always has been.  You versus us.  We’re thinking maybe if we move enough of that stuff, we can deplete your resources.  Take you down.

(Pauses)

            I can take you up there if you like.  Back to LV-223.  I can show you for yourselves what it’s all about.

CUT to the other side of the glass.  SHAW is suddenly seized with pain.

SHAW

            Oh, God, no!  I can feel it!  It’s all coming back!

She collapses in VICKERS arms.

CUT to the interrogation side of the glass.  WILSON has his hand to his left ear.

WILSON

            Guess this will have to wait for another day, pal.

CUT to a shot of SHAW lying on a nice leather couch, unconscious.  Gradually, she wakes up and opens her eyes, then with a sigh sits upright and faces forward.

CUT to a shot of VICKERS sitting at a desk.  They are in an office that resembles a psychiatrist’s office.  A lamp on VICKER’s desk is the only source of light.  Stacks of papers and photographs of family members, perhaps that don’t exist, sit on her desk.  As VICKERS and SHAW converse, the camera cuts between these two shots of them.

VICKERS

            You okay, Shaw?

SHAW

            Yes.  It’s just that, hearing that. . .  the idea of going back there. . .  it really took something out of me.  Also, I felt it again.

(Pauses)

            Where are we?

VICKERS

            This is my office.  Please, make yourself at home.  You’ve been through a lot over the past day.

SHAW

            It almost looks like a psychiatrist’s office.  I. . .  we. . .  Charlie and I had offices like this.

VICKERS

            Before, you said that you felt it again.  That. . .  that “force.”  Do you. . .  feel like saying anything more about that?

SHAW takes a cup of water sitting on a table by the couch and drinks from it.  She then pauses before speaking.

SHAW

            No.  No, not right now.  I have to get to the bottom of this.  Vickers, can you give me my husband back?  That’s what I want right now, more than anything.

VICKERS

            All right. . .  yes.  Yes, I can.  But it’s complicated, Shaw.  I need to talk to some people.

SHAW

            It doesn’t seem fair.  You bring me back like this, in this way. . .  but it’s like I’m all alone.  Like I’m not even real.  There’s got to be more that you can do for me.  I want. . .  I have to have Charlie back.

VICKERS

            Right.  I understand.  I sympathize.  But first thing’s first.  We lost, or nearly lost, a good man today.  And if Tyrell Corp. gets its way, we might not be around for much longer to bring Charlie back.  We need to address this first.

(Pauses)

            Will you go with me to Tyrell Corp?  I’ve scheduled a meeting with their CEO. 

SHAW

            Okay.  Yes, I will.  But. . . 

(Pauses, tears in her eyes)

            . . .you promise me!

VICKERS

            I promise.  You can trust us.  Wait for me outside?

CUT back to the shot of SHAW sitting on the couch.  She has set the cup of water back down on the table.  She pauses and looks at VICKERS.  Then she nods “yes,” gets up, and opens and walks out of a door to her right.

CUT back to VICKERS.  She reaches below her desk and pulls out a communication helmet, the same type of helmet used by David in Prometheus.  She puts it on and begins to speak into it.

VICKERS

            It’s definitely Shaw.  She’s the one.  Yes sir.  We were right to clone her.  But there’s more.  She’s making demands.  She wants us to clone her husband.  I know.  I know it’s hard.  I had thought. . .  maybe with the other Security Officers.  Right.  Olson’s hurt pretty bad.  He should be better in about a week.  Yes sir, understood.  End transmission.

CUT to an exterior, daylight shot of Tyrell Corp. headquarters.  We see it from a tilted, bird’s eye view.  A silver, metallic car drives up to the front entrance, and out of the car and through the entrance walk SHAW and VICKERS, flanked on both sides by two Security Officers, respectively.

CUT to a shot of the smoky, dimly lit lobby of Tyrell Corp.  SHAW, VICKERS, and the Security Officers emerge from an automatic doorway and enter, letting in a great deal of light from outside.  A dark silver, metallic android with a rectangular body, four telescoping limbs, a cylindrical head, and a television monitor on its stomach flies over with a whirr to great them.

CUT to a close-up shot of the android.  A pale, bald oriental man in a robe is displayed on its television monitor.  Two oriental women, also in robes, are sitting next to him, and the three laugh and eat sushi.  Eastern music is audible on the android’s audio feed.

ANDROID

            Going up?

CUT to a shot of SHAW looking at VICKERS and VICKERS looking at SHAW.  They then face forward and walk toward the android.  Their security detail follows.

CUT to a shot of an immense office area.  Everything is tinged orange from the sunlight coming through the massive windows, the floor is tiled, and there are potted plants near the elevator.  After we hear a ping, the elevator opens and the android, SHAW, VICKERS, and the security detail walk through.  Off-camera, a voice says “welcome!”

CUT to a shot of the opposite side of this room.  There is a desk with a computer monitor and a large, dark entrance behind it.  What lies beyond it is hidden in shadow.  To the left and right side of this entrance are two more potted plants.  Suddenly, the oriental man in the robe from the television monitor emerges from the entrance.  It had been his voice we just heard off-camera.  He is holding a pot of tea and two tea cups on a plate.  His name is TYRELL.

TYRELL

            I understand you are here on official business.  I’m sure we can get to the bottom of it.  Please, sit!  Can I offer you some tea?

CUT to a shot of SHAW and VICKERS sitting down in two chairs that are in front of the desk.  The four Security Officers remain standing.  VICKERS smiles, while SHAW looks confused, worried.

VICKERS

            Please!

CUT to a shot of TYRELL walking towards them with the tea.  Then CUT back to a shot of TYRELL filling the tea cups of SHAW and VICKERS.

CUT to a shot of TYRELL sitting down in a chair at the front of the desk, facing SHAW, VICKERS, and their security detail.  He pours himself a cup of tea.  The camera will cut between these two sides during the conversation between VICKERS and SHAW and TYRELL.

TYRELL

            Let’s get down to business.  You say you uncovered some sort of undercover operation last night?  Some sort of intergalactic material?

VICKERS

            Right.  It happened last night.  A lot of the specifics about what we know about the material are classified, but it will come out as the legal part of this runs its course.  What I can tell you now is that we have a suspect, Thomas Stephens, who is. . .  who will testify that Tyrell Corp. has had some involvement in moving this product.  It’s dangerous, Tyrell.  It can kill people.

(Pauses)

            It can do a lot worse.

TYRELL

            I see.  Well, trust me when I say that I don’t know anything about this.  It certainly wouldn’t have received my approval.  We certainly aren’t involved in any illegal chemical operations, that I can assure you.  But. . .

(Pauses)

            . . .that doesn’t mean some rogue element within Tyrell isn’t responsible.  I’ll level with you.  Ever since my father was killed by that rogue droid, things haven’t quite been the same here.  Yes, anything is possible.  I think. . .  we need. . .  to work together on this.  We have our security officers too, you know.  Yes.  You’ll see.  We’ll sort it all out.

Suddenly, from off-camera, the voice of the android.

ANDROID

            Sir?

CUT to a close-up shot of the android.  It’s been watching the conversation this whole time.  On its television monitor, an angry crowd just outside the building is yelling and waving signs with anti-android slogans.  The android raises its right arm and points to its right, to indicate the location of the crowd.

ANDROID

            They’re right outside, sir.  They should be visible from the balcony.  Do you want me to call for the police?

CUT back to TYRELL.

TYRELL

            Oh, dear.  This has become a recurring problem.  We do make androids.

CUT to SHAW and VICKERS.

SHAW

            Wait.  Maybe I can talk to them.

CUT to TYRELL.

TYRELL

            Yes.  Yes, go on.

CUT to a long shot of SHAW, VICKERS, TYRELL, the android, and the security detail exiting the office area and walking through a pair of glass doors.  We then CUT to an exterior shot of the group emerging onto a glass balcony.  This shot is a slanted, birds eye view of the scene, and we can see the angry crowd below them.

CUT to a shot of SHAW standing near the edge of the balcony, facing the crowd.  We see this from the crowd’s perspective.  The crowd, seeing her, stop yelling and lower their signs.

CUT to a close-up shot of SHAW, who begins to speak.

SHAW

            Attention!  Listen to me!  I understand your pain!  I. . .  we’ve been through a lot over the past 24 hours, and I want you to know that this isn’t the way.  We’re all different.  I. . .  I don’t even know if I’m real. 

(Her eyes tear up, and tears begin to roll down her face, but she continues)

            I don’t know what you’re going through, what situations you’re struggling with, or whatever.  But an android killed my husband.  And now, she’s my only way out of this.  So. . .

(Pauses)

            . . .I think we need to work together.

CUT to a shot of the crowd from over SHAW’s shoulder.  Some members of the crowd have started to walk away.  Others stand and look at SHAW, their signs lowered.

CUT to a close-up of a large, rugged man who is at the center of the crowd.  He  looks at SHAW intensely, then flings his sign to the ground.  He and the remainder of the crowd follow the others who are leaving.

CUT to a sideways view of the group that is standing on the balcony.  VICKERS turns to SHAW.

VICKERS

            Well done, Shaw.  It’s a brave new world out there.

END